jcd1013: (XF - favorite hug)
President Hinckley just died. At 97 years old (although until his 95th birthday, you'd have mistaken him for a 70 year old). He was my prophet, the man that I looked to for guidance and testimony since I was a teenager and I almost thought that he was going to live forever (or at least until 100). I was in the choir that performed when he gave the devotional on the 6 Be's (be grateful, be smart, be clean, be true, be humble, be prayerful) and I remember the tears that sprang to my eyes as we sang "We thank thee, O God, for a Prophet," feeling, knowing that God's prophet was in that room. I'm going to miss his gentle humor, his optimism, his example and his overwhelming love that he has for all of us.

I'd say "rest in peace," but knowing the life that he led, I doubt that there's going to be much resting going on. :) But we love you and we'll miss you.

For the full story, for those interested, read here.
jcd1013: (Everwood - Perfect day)
I decided to make a list. I don't know why.

- Crush news (which right now, is ever so much more interesting than patients and their neuroanatomy): He has a freckle on his right ear lobe, and a faint, thin scar down his right middle finger. His hair curls across his forehead (it's such a good thing that these many many years have trained restraint!) and he's had his beard for as long as he's been a resident here (as evidenced by his name badge) which manages to hide a very small dimple and I can't find adjectives to describe his blue eyes. And he has really bad breath post call. Oh, and he owes me big time for doing his discharge summary for him. Am I wonderful or what?

- I had a wonderful weekend. Saturday night, when I woke up from the post call coma, I went to the symphony with one of the neurosurgery residents. Mahler. My dad used to love Mahler, but until Sat. night, I never understood why. I'm now addicted. Absolutely lovely.

- Sunday I went to watch conference at my bishop's house, which is always a spiritually uplifting time. Pres. Hinckley is still looking amazing for his 95+ years. One of the guys there hugged me and reminded me that it was exactly one year since we had met. I had forgotten. I thought that was sweet.

- It was the first day off that Chris and I have had off together in 2 months, so I drove up to Madison and spent the afternoon and evening with him, fixing his bike, eating Vietnamese food, and digging through all of his music collection. I came home with 300+ new songs and all of his pictures from Ireland and Scotland. Scotland was incredibly gorgeous from his pics... I guess I'd better add that back to the list of Must-Go places.

- Chris broke up with his girlfriend. And didn't tell me until I pressed. Okay, I think I overlooked a big dropped hint earlier in the evening, when we were putting together pictures for a framed collage, but still. *sigh* Anyway, we had a great talk sitting on a park bench overlooking the lake. I told him about the many dating woes of the past two months. He thinks I'm missing clues (I think that no reciprocation and avoidance of conversation afterwards speaks volumes). He's thinking about taking up Match.com dating, which I can't wait to see how that goes. :)

- I'm still really bad at music guessing games. Apparently I need to listen to more Phish and Eagle Eyed Cherry(ies?).

-He beat me on the word games as well. The Word of the Day emails are not helping.

-I'm not on call again until Saturday. !!!

-The Seeker has gotten terrible reviews and didn't do so well at the box office. Maybe that will stop any sequels.

-Still can't figure out exactly what you do on Facebook, but at least it lacks the ads and spam of Myspace. Am trying to collect friends like mad over there. Perhaps I will make a trophy wall with all of my friends. I guess I need to add more photos, or so a little bird told me.

-I'm reading New Moon right now, as I finished Twilight a few weeks ago on call (man, I miss the ICU call). Liked Twilight, although spent a majority of the book irritated at the heroine and her love interest. I'm really looking forward to reading this, after mulling over [livejournal.com profile] valancy_s's recent posts about why we go for vampires.

-Congrats to Michelle and Kelly! Maybe, hopefully, I'll be able to see this little one before he/she's 40 (are you going home for Christmas?)

-I love Matchbox Twenty. This new album is just gorgeous as always.

- You all are watching Friday Night Lights, right? You'd better be. Best show on TV right now. I'm watching it online, so what's your excuse?

-Clinic tomorrow. Only 3 patients. Maybe I'll actually finish on time (and possibly get my notes done, that would be amazing).

For real?

Jun. 12th, 2007 12:34 am
jcd1013: (FTB - Mockery)
Found randomly browsing through Myspace, when I clicked on the link for people who attended my medical school and found this (if you're not LDS, probably won't make much sense):


Somehow, I'm just not seeing the General Authorities spending their free time browsing around adding each other, filling out memes and choosing their favorite MoTab song to blare every time you click on their profile. But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe they're much more down with it than I thought. :)
jcd1013: (Eeyore)
This has been a rather sucky Memorial Day.

I invited friends over for dinner/hang out early this week. Two people responded. One was on call, the other was post call and would come over if she woke up on time. She hasn't called, so I'm assuming she overslept (I do the same post call, so I can't blame her).

There was a big party and BBQ on the lake today with my ward and when my plans fell through, I decided that this would be fun to go to. Until I took one step outdoors and realized that my eyes are not healed enough to face the sun. They feel slightly better, the eye drops are helping. But I won't be able to wear contacts tomorrow and will have to go to work with my freakish glasses. :( Seriously, people, they're ugly.

I didn't get called in this weekend, so I guess it's something, but I'm still bitter that because of this pseudo call, I didn't get to go and see Susan or Allison or just get out of town. I barely left the house. Blah. My last weekend free until July and I wasted it. No, it really was nice vegging around the house. I arranged all of the pictures on my computer (and ate up every bit of free space I have), so that they're ready for uploading. And I watched "Shall We Dance?" which was just the right amount of sappy angst to do me good (and hey, I recognized some of the Chicago stuff!), so it wasn't all bad.

I'm sorry for the negative posts recently. I'm not sure exactly why I feel like I'm on the edge of depression... It's something I can get out of easily and I know that I'm not clinically depressed, just something that I tend to slide into. I've had a lot of pressures and stresses that I didn't think I'd have to deal with. Money problems. Lots and lots of money problems. Exposition on the issues, cut to be nice )

On a related note (at least in my head, don't worry if you don't get the connection), I think I'm going to start a spirituality/religious filter for some of my posts. Mostly because this is stuff that I don't want the random person to read it and misunderstand (not that really prevents me from anything, but religion has always been extremely personal to me) and because I don't want to become a preachy blog and subject it on people who would rather not read it on a daily occasional basis. That being said, it's open to any and all who are interested, especially you guys; I envision it as a place where you can ask me questions about my beliefs and I can just blather. And if it's just me, hey, I suppose I could get used to the private diary thing again.... *snort* This does mean that Liz and AJ who I know read my blog, and anybody else out there in Lurkdome would actually have to get a LJ to read those. My evils plans will work, I tell you!

Okay. To bed. Hopefully, tomorrow, my eye will feel magically all better.
jcd1013: (Default)
I find that music is one of the best channels I have in my spirituality--the words, the soaring notes pierce my heart even if it's a little hardened, cynical or distant. There's something about it that brings me closer to God, back on path. Granted, it has to be good music, good lyrics, not sentimental crap that is designed purely to try to get you to cry (I could list hundreds of exampes that instead of making me feel warm and fuzzy get me so irritated I can't see straight).

In church today, we had a musical number that did exactly that, inspired me rather. I don't know if it was the singer or the instrumentation that backed (flute, piano and a string quartet... lovely combination), but I don't think there was a dry eye in the chapel. I came home and promptly did a google search to see if I could find a recording of that particular arrangement. No such luck, but I did find the lyrics. And since there are many of my friends who have been struggling recently, I thought there might be someone else who is touched as well.

Unanswered Yet by Charles D Tillman )

*hugs to everyone*
jcd1013: (JCC embracing each other)
This was one of my favorite quotes in college. I rediscovered it tonight.

Helena, a young physician (LOL), has been pleading her love for Bertram who is leaving the city. His mother overhears her and confronts her about her feelings. I used to have this memorized:

Then, I confess,
Here on my knee, before high heaven and you,
That before you, and next unto high heaven,
I love your son.
My friends were poor, but honest; so's my love:
Be not offended; for it hurts not him
That he is loved of me: I follow him not
By any token of presumptuous suit;
Nor would I have him till I do deserve him;
Yet never know how that desert should be.
I know I love in vain, strive against hope;
Yet in this captious and intenible sieve
I still pour in the waters of my love
And lack not to lose still: thus, Indian-like,
Religious in mine error, I adore
The sun, that looks upon his worshipper,
But knows of him no more.

~All's Well That Ends Well~

I don't think it takes much analysis to understand why I love it so much. :)

Unrelated religious stuff, mostly for me )

I'm submitting my match list tomorrow (if I can find the sticker! And in my mess of a room, that's not going to be an easy feat) and for the first time since this whole interview process started, I feel good about it. Still sad, yes, and trying not to think about my last months, but good and confident.
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