A week ago, I nearly hyperventilated to my therapist that I was completely overwhelmed with projects and deadlines (all for April 15th, of course) and was nearly shutting down because of the stress. Just talking to her helped me process through a lot of my issues (perfectionism combined with procrastination combined with impostor syndrome) and I was able to make a list of things to do and tackle, in a format that didn’t freak me out more. She also gave me permission to slack off on a few things – as long as I contacted others to pick up that slack. It’s been a terribly busy week and my sleep schedule sucks, but I’m breathing just a little easier.
My credentialing paperwork has been submitted with all of the required certificates and documentation. I committed to talk at a conference this summer. I completed my semi-annual OPPE evaluations. I sent off a rough draft of my book chapter to my colleague yesterday - not as complete as I had hoped, but nearly 3/4th of the way done and she’ll work on it this week (she’s a much faster writer than I am) and I’ll make final edits early next week. I’ve started on my CV and education portfolio for my annual review and thanks to the above colleague, it’s in the right format. It looks sparse, but I’m reassured that they are very unlikely to fire me. Taxes are done. I emailed colleagues about lectures for the fellows (something that I hate doing), and even though things have fallen through yet again for next week, I’m not as stressed out about it – plus I have made changes to next year schedule so it’ll be much, much less stressful.
I’m off to a wedding this weekend down in Santa Barbara. I still need to rent a car tonight and look for a hotel for a couple of nights I need to do laundry and pack. And I need to stain my roots with henna and go see I Love Lucy the musical (I don’t even know, but it came with my season tickets), so even this vacation is starting out in stress-mode. But I am so looking forward to sun and beach (I soak up every bit of the ocean that I can get), I have a really gorgeous new dress to wear, and I might actually allow myself to enjoy it.